A Vermont humor writer explores the funny side of home, family, and life in the country.
Welcome!
The following essays first appeared in “Around the Bend,” my long-running biweekly humor column in the Addison Independent in Vermont. If they make you laugh, share them with your friends. If they don’t, share them with your enemies.
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A small bet leads to a big commitment
“Fred dared Mark to ask out their waitress, betting five dollars that she was too snooty to go out with him. … Reader, that snooty waitress was me.”
A simple Thanksgiving? No thanks
“If I don’t spend the next three days and nights preparing everything from scratch, how will we all enjoy the seven to 10 minutes it takes for us to wolf down our meal?”
I took on Black Friday—and won
“I had been looking forward to setting aside my dignity and personal safety just to save a few bucks.”
Paranormal podcast changes my perspective
“Slowly, it half-raised one unnaturally long arm, and I noticed that its black sleeve hung down in tatters, like the robe of a visitor from the dead.”
Home haircuts have their hazards
“I plugged in the clippers, cinched a towel around Mark’s neck until he made a slight gurgling noise, and made my first pass, just behind his left ear…”
I solemnly swear I had jury duty
“The one-day trial played out a lot like you see on TV—just more boring.”